It’s the end of a long day, we are all tired. Bath time meltdowns lead to far too many people raising their voices and hurting each other with words that cut like knives. Where is the mother I used to be, sometimes I don’t recognize myself anymore. This stress is wearing us thin.
She is a five-year old that has had her world turned upside down and we expect her to handle things like an adult, but even us adults aren’t managing things very well these days.
I crawl into bed, baby in one arm 5-year-old in the other and whisper softly “forgive me my sweet child” you don’t deserve any of this. They deserve the best of us not the worst, I raise my voice far too often around here these days, yet I am so hard on her when she loses her temper. I need to change.
I want to search out the simple mothering skills that are heart led not stress led, I want to be able to look my children in the eye and know I have given them my very best. I want to be the mother I used to be to her, and to him…. no wait I want to be even better than that.
I want to see the sparkle in their eyes and know we had something to do with that. I will do better tomorrow than I did today, I promise you sweet girl.